Sunday, January 28, 2007

Bachmann Turns Her Overdrive

I'm not sure what the headline for this post might mean; perhaps I'm just dizzily slaphappy with the thought that we've already found a replacement for Katherine Harris, whom most of us were beginning to miss. (Oh, fess up, you were too.)

Michele Bachmann, you've surely heard by now, is the freshman Representative who felt up Bush after the State of the Union address. While Bachmann sure looks like the clone of the great dame Harris herself, she is the spiritual spawn of Tammy Faye and Phyllis Schlafly, what with her "special obsession" with gays, gays, gays.

Bachmann's most notable cause in the Minnesota State Senate was her repeated (and failed) attempts to introduce an anti-gay marriage amendment--a cause which brought her lesbian stepsister Helen LaFave out of the closet and onto the hearing floor to testify against the bill, not to mention to write this zinger for the local newspaper's letter section mocking Bachmann's own "lifestyle" choices:
For someone whose dream job has always been that of a wife and mother, state Sen. Michele Bachmann seems to have made an odd career choice. The Jan. 1 photo depicting her vacuuming in heels is just as confusing. Perhaps what she really meant to say is that her dream job has always been that of politician and actress.

Helen LaFave, Minneapolis

Bachmann had been an embarrassment to Minnesota for quite some time before she pawed her way into the national spotlight. Her moonbat buffoonery is sure to provide plenty of laughs in the coming months, and Watertiger at Firedoglake starts off the season by dispensing with Bachmann's Bushlust and, as a bonus, thoughtfully drags her husband (a therapist who is virulently homophobic and allegedly "cures gays") into the cesspool of innuendo:

God woke me up this morning and told me to wear something ivory-colored on Tuesday night. I think I know just the outfit. Now what to do about jewelry? I can't ask Marcus - he's sound asleep after last night's session of making homosexuals ungay at those evil nightclubs in St. Paul. I wonder if God will speak to me (I mean, The Father, not studmuffin George Bush!)

As for the Divine Ms. Harris, she was seen handing out her business cards to the State of the Union crowd. How the mighty have fallen.